This didn’t make the cut but I still like the idea of having a Juicy Couture Bike fashion show. Just think: Beautiful dresses, like prom dresses, something some little bratty girl would love to get her snotty hands on. Skin-and-bone models wearing these dresses, looking utterly disgusting yet entrancing and envious of their tiny beauty. Bulky jewelry that seems much to heavy for their minuscule frames hangs off their protruding shoulders. Scarves and wraps simply drape over them, dwarfing these dolled-up birds. So much make-up on that you’re not sure exactly what you’re looking at. Is she a mannequin? Is she human? Why can’t I look away, she’s hideous yet so de toute beauté.
Now imagine these pretty sticks with bike helmets on. Yes helmets! Their hair wraps around the helmet, suddenly it’s an art piece. Intricate strands wrapped with twigs and ribbon and woven around glittery straps connected to this seemingly simple encasement on her head. See these little tweens, sitting side-saddle on a bike, while their muscular yet just as anorexic escort walks the bicycle down the runway. The wispy little creatures look so unnatural and foreign sitting on such structured and strong carriers. They wear oversized boots that lace and strap up to their bony knees.
So fragile. So engaging.
And all anyone can think is, “This is so glamorous.” Funny how that word means to deceive. Deceive the public. Make them believe that bikes are high fashion. The wheels are the new Gucci purse. This helmet, these knee pads, that bell and reflector, those are your accessories. You must be seen with these items, these fad articles of clothing, and you’ll be considered à la mode.
1 Comment
November 18, 2008 at 11:51 am
dude I totally dig it! juicy is all about putting silly looking extravagantly outfitted girls in weird places/w/weird things. it would be funny