Yesterday went awful. I never had time to make my storyboard, and no matter what I said to try to compensate, I knew it wouldn’t make a difference, and it didn’t. Friday morning I knew that my whole presentation would flop if I didn’t have a freaking storyboard, and at 11:59 am I knew that I if I didn’t plot then I wouldn’t have anything at all.
I’m just so pissed at myself. What was the point of everything I did if when it all came down to it, I made it not matter? The point, the innovation, the countless hours spent making everything work out just went down the drain. It was like having the bread, vegetables, and dessert without any meat to go along with your dinner. I knew that. They knew that. So why the hell would anyone want just another version of a key that seems more like a downgrade than innovation? Why try to learn a new concept when it seems like a bad idea? I did my product a disservice in every essence of the word and the worst part is it doens’t matter now.
I went from loving this project and so excited to explain and present how great it was to wondering what the fuck did I just spend the last 4 weeks on?
I keep trying to not think “What was the point of it all?” but I can’t stop.
I’m watching t.v. right now, really watching the commercials. Watching the “professionals” make every piece of shit product seem like the viewer can’t live without it. Striking to emotions and needs and wants of the public. A finished product, where you can see how it works and why it’s better than the other brands, products. And then I think about what I just did. Of course you can’t understand how it works, you can’t see how it works.
I mean I know I learned a lot from this project but all that’s really sticking out to me right now is make damn sure that I have a storyboard, I think I might start all my projects from now on that way. Which isn’t a bad way to start. But is that really all I learned? Is that enough? I didn’t really take in what the reviewers said to me, nothing positive that they said. The only thing that keeps replaying in my mind so vividly is that simple phrase, “I don’t get it.” I don’t see how it works. Obviously you’ve thought a lot about this and have accompllished something, but I don’t understand how it actually works. Maybe if you had some type of storyboard that explained how this lock mechanism works then it might make more sense.
And the worst part is that was said at the beginning of my review. The only way I could cope was to act like some type of defensive snotty bitch to them the rest of the time. Every comment they made I had a response. I had to let them know that I really had thought of everything you could ask, and I tried relating it to my pathetic excuse that I called boards, and it made them feel a little uncomfortable because of it. They slowly stopped commenting at all to the point that only two actually said much at all. When David called the end of my time, it seemed more like “Let’s end this before it gets any worse.” Obviously I wasn’t doing a good job. Obviously this was getting nowhere. Obviously I failed. What did I do for the past 4 weeks?
And I had to be the one who held everyone up in the beginning, too. It’s like the icing on top of a great big ol’ wedding cake. Just sitting there, everyone looking at it, wanting to taste it, to put their finger through a small corner to have a bit before everyone else, but then after all the hype and waiting and expectation, when you actually get to have your share you realize that this cake tastes like shit.
Congratulations.
